Not Enough for Everyone

A dear, dear, very kind, friend wrote (some parts snipped):
My dearest, dearest friend - I am so familiar with the downhill spiral of an elderly parent and I wish I could be there to do whatever I could to help…  There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of you and wish you peace, joy and love... You do what you need to do for your Dad.  I look back at Mom's last months and weeks and even days and have no regrets about what I did to help her.  There were days that a certain member of the family tried to guilt me into not doing what I KNEW was right and I found the strength to ignore that stupidity and I know how much my Mom appreciated it, even if she didn't remember me coming by...  it is one of the hardest things in the world to go through [and] you are doing what you can and it will give you peace one day just in knowing that you did what you could.My response was so much like my blog entries lately that I figured it fit here:

Thank you so much for your wise and helpful note.   The only thing is, between the girls, Scott and my dad, I don't feel as if I'm doing enough for any of them, or even myself.  I wish I could just have a week here by myself and then let everyone come home when I would be organized and rested.  But I have a feeling it wouldn't happen anyway.  I had all afternoon today where I could do so much, and what did my mind and body do?  They went into escape mode.  I kind of had a narcoleptic hour, and while Emily watched TV (again), I slept; hard deep sleep in my un-made bed.  I didn't even try. I went in to make the bed, and just kind of collapsed into it.So, I do hope I am doing what I can for Dad, but everything I do seems so very short of adequate.  It feels as if I'm the one in a downward spiral, into a vortex of clutter, both mental and literal.Boy, that was good--I think I'll put it into my blog! Speaking of blogs, where has yours been?  Let me (ok, us) know what's going on with you!